See Your Awesome

I just read a beautiful article I would love to share with you:

http://www.livingandlifedesigned.com/help-children-build-body-confidence-struggle/

Written by a mother of three, she addresses how to help children build a positive body image. As with most things, it starts from within. After reading the article, what positive heart characteristics can you list about yourself?

5 things I know are good about me:

Creative, Resilient, Compassionate, Considerate, Intelligent

Emma Watson Introduces He For She Solidarity Movement

UN Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson speaks eloquently and powerfully on unifying the gender equality movement.

Not only so that women have equal rights Everywhere in the world, yet also so that men can be free to be sensitive and all can respect ourselves for who we are. She says it beautifully. Please do watch and leave a comment here or on her twitter: @EmWatson

Support the movement by your actions. Be one of the ‘inadvertent feminists’ she speaks of. Take action here via the #HeForShe website, as well.

I have Hope for the End of Street Harassment

The work of Tatyana Fazlalizadeh, artist and activist, is incredibly inspiring. She is combating street harassment using only her art and her mind, and the stories of volunteers!

Read what she’s doing and why: http://www.tlynnfaz.com/Stop-Telling-Women-to-Smile

Check out the Official website of Stop Telling Women to Smile.

And follow STWTS on Twitter: @STWTSmile

I agree with what she posted on her Tumblr, that telling women to smile is akin to asking us not to express our full range of human emotions. You could say that ‘it’s nice, I want you to be happy,’ but no one’s happiness other than your own is under your control. As well, having other emotions is an integral part of experiencing happiness eventually, and of feeling safe. Honestly, I hope that lots of people smile, because it’s a joyful activity. However, I know from my experience as a woman that I feel afraid to smile or make eye contact with people when I’m out in public, for fear they will take my smile as an invitation to harass me. Personally, I have hope for the end of street harassment.

Are you wondering what you can do to help end street harassment? I hope you are! Here’s an article that gives great points to start from, called ‘Three Ways Straight Dudes Can Help End Street Harassment.’

Wherever you run, there you are: Runaway Bride

So I’ve decided maybe a Julia Roberts marathon is in order. Tonight might be …. Pretty Woman? Mystic Pizza? Erin Brokovich? I really resonate with Julia’s works of art/film.

The take home message for me from ‘Runaway Bride‘ (I will do my best to minimize ‘spoilers’) is that you HAVE TO LOVE YOURSELF BEFORE YOU LOVE SOMEONE ELSE, AND BEFORE THEY CAN KNOW AND LOVE YOU.

This is something I’ve been learning in my own life for a while now. It’s difficult initially. I think many of us feel this void and we want to fill it… so we think ‘what do I need? a relationship!’ It may feel like the magical answer, but what about your relationship with yourself? How about working on that for a while?

Personally I’m reaping great benefits from nurturing my relationship with myself. With increasing frequency I’ll see something kind I did for myself (my bed is made and the sheets look smooth and comfortable and pretty…. or I concocted a really delicious smoothie…. or a note I wrote for myself complete with ‘Love, Me’ as the signature) and when I see these things, I feel this powerful and beautiful sense of ‘aww, someone loves me! Oh, I love me!’ It’s a great feeling. It’s really worth it.

I used to identify with the scene with the eggs. Watch the movie. You’ll see what I’m talking about.

Any fear we experience is internal; it’s about Self. The only remedy for that is to fully accept and love yourself Exactly the way you are now, dark and light and all. Face the dark, rejoice in the light, and you’ll eventually be just who you imagine and wish that you could be.

Setting my Standards

I’ve been wondering…. who sets the standard of “beauty”?

Who says it’s shaved legs?

  1. the photos in fashion magazines?
  2. the pornographers?
  3. the women who don’t dare miss a day of shaving their legs?
  4. the men who require their girlfriend or wife to shave her legs?

Who says it’s high heels?

  1. the corporations who sell high heels, but could sell something else if they chose to?
  2. the pornographers?
  3. the women who wear high heels because they ‘want to look sexy’ and don’t think they do in flats?
  4. the men who give lots of attention to women wearing heels?

What do you actually want to wear on your feet? For comfort’s sake? For safety’s sake?

Have you ever actually tried growing out your leg hair? Have you tried loving yourself despite long hair on your legs? Have you? Because I promise you it is possible.

Here’s my proof.

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I’m heterosexual, and brush my teeth every day, and love myself completely. It’s totally possible- in fact, it’s true. And I spent 6 months without shaving.

Agreeing with Hubby

I’d like to propose a tweet:  A #strong married #woman agrees with her husband because she chose a husband who has similar #values to her own. #feelinggoodfeminism

Make it go viral.

I recently have read some things stating that women ought to agree with their husbands out of respect for their marriage, and ought to cede to her husband’s decisions because he has the final word. Aside from suddenly needing to vomit, I feel that there is something inherently dangerous about this idea of unconditional support based on convention rather than based on intelligent agreement and trust.

I would choose to marry someone who upholds the same values I do, both in words and actions. I hope that my fellow women feel the same about choosing a partner; that partnership is based on similar values, trust, respect, and intellectual interest in one another’s ideas and projects. I believe in equal cooperation.

I would hope that men can do the same, seeking a partner who is similar to you intellectually and morally, so that you trust in her decisions. Choose the path of strength; be honest with your partner, tell her how you really feel about things so that you both make informed decisions about your continued partnership.

I can say these things all day long, and the most important portion remains that I must continue to practice making good intelligent decisions for myself, learning who I am and expressing my personality in everything I do, and speaking my story to those whom I come to trust will treasure it.

How to Survive Valentines Day

I used to be the first to assert that ‘holiday pressure’ didn’t get to me, and yet, it has been doing so lately. I’ve decided that for Valentines day, which can be one of the most pressured of the year for many people, I am going to be my own Valentine.

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I have always been one to go a little overboard for a holiday which is all hearts and flowers! Once I designed a lovely bouquet at a florist’s shop, and gave a ring and several mix CDs to a beau. Another time I made a youtube playlist, gave an artistic and highly-personalized handmade card, baked something sweet, and spent a sweet evening watching a favorite movie together. For a third and non-romantic example, I made three watercolored hearts and added glitter and kind messages of thanks and friendly adoration. All I want is for someone to show the same devoted attention to me! So I am.

  • Baking a banana bread for myself
  • And a cupcake, with frosting of course, and totally allergen-free
  • Making a lovely handmade and glitter-full card for myself, which says sweet things
  • Watching a favorite movie or show (Downton Abbey? Stardust? haven’t decided yet)
  • I considered buying myself a red rose, and then nixed the idea for now.
  • Letting myself off the hook. I am not obligated to do any of this for anyone. I’m doing it for myself to show myself how worthy and loved I am.

I’m doing what I’ve wanted to do for years; show myself the same love and consideration I show to other people, and doing so because of me. Simple as that. I always used to develop a reason related to someone else if I were to do something kind for myself, and now the reason is me. I deserve kindness, simply because I am.